-the newly washed sheets are warm from your body heat and the duvet smells of fabric conditioner and your scent.
-the coffee brewing downstairs and the smell of the newly bought french bread on the table
-the sound of classic fm playing softly in the background
-the smell of bacon wafting from the grill, and the orange juice freshly squeezed from its skin.
but wait, where’s the cheese?
i love lazy saturday mornings.
–with happiness and “thank you’s”..
-Ayen and family gave me a wonderful present over the mail…it was a Nicholas Sparks book and two postcards that reek of the Baldoman’s weekend in San Francisco. I was elated,to say the least.
Ayen is the type that surprises you because she hardly passes a word in between months, then you suddenly get a wonderful thought over the mail. Her generosity humbles me.
-I have my own dried fish mafia. Yes i do, and its headed by nonetheless, the person who i run to, day and night when i need help and comfort. She does give me my comfort food too.
Kharla sent me a box of my favourite “buwad”/dried fish–and they’re the cheaper kind, not the “danggit” version.
I am dancing for joy…while my husband is having nervous attacks everytime i cook them as he feels asphyxiated by the smell (i always warn him in adance, and i only cook it on weekends when he’s in the garden or away).
* * *
Also, to add to my happiness, im quite busy.
With these….
(storyboard presentation in class, hehe)
–yet to be mailed to my lovelies–
* * *
i wish all my love ones’ hearts are singing beautiful tunes right now.
( im posting a happy picture here, or definitely an afternoon of happiness
when i took this picture)
-for my sister Ana that she will be doing things that she enjoys doing. im so happy that she found herself and i’m so proud of her . i know she’ll do great in the path that she’s chosen.
-for Leah, as she finally decided to fly and work in Dubai. She had an opportunity a long time ago but she wanted to try flexing her muscles in the world of academe in Cebu but felt too constricted where she was. Now, she will have a smorgasbord of work waiting for her in Dubai. Sadly, she wont be in Cebu when i go home.
-for Cheche, that she is finally in the arms of the one she loves. Her small family is complete again.
thats it for now.
Ades and i went for a visit to St. Andrews church in Shoeburyness. It was an attempt to get a feel of the place before P and B’s wedding in december. Moreover, it was a productive break from my essay writing (university work).
The church was a good 30 minutes drive from where we live, yet the drive there was amazing. we passed by the beach and some countryside, and yet again i was mesmerized.
There was an eerie feel to the church as it was a grey and cold day,not to mention there was a cemetery just by the church’s grounds.
it was a sombre afternoon, there was not a soul in the church grounds but there was a “presence” that you could feel.
im sure the wedding will be fantastic. i just hope, ill do justice to it.
friend lauren is an active air cadet member and organizes charity do’s for their group. she organized the air cadet race night which was held in the woodsfarm barn in ongar.
she invited a group of us, her friends to join as her guests,as the participants are from the air cadets and their families.
(the gang enjoying a pre-meal drink)
(suppah duppah couple)
( chris and her hubby tom )
(michael and tash–another suppa duppa couple)
(bartenders for the night; lauren and boyfriend stu)
(tom’s a happy bunny)
(deciding which horse to pick)
(tasha and michael going for a decider)
(win or lose? you get to know from their expressions,hehe)
(we almost won!)
(got fed..will bet..)
( adrian and his driver)
*we won 3 out of the 8 races that night, so we went home happy!
*race night: (a video monitor will show a race of maybe 10 horses and people will bet on any horse, then if the horse wins, you get to win cash prize–very minimal as its done for charity and fun). the whole night’s proceeds go to charities the air cadets are sponsoring. the atmosphere was very casual and jovial, the drinks werent pricey, and the tickets came with a meal of spit roast lamb, burger patties, sausages, salad and wraps for the vegetarians.
im so lucky!
i can almost sing “the hills are alive with the sound of music” if only i knew the lyrics.
i dont deserve these gifts but the husband obviously thinks i do. (in hindsight, i know he was eyeing my D200 for himself, but he knows its only on “loan” basis to him on photographing weekends, haha).
nevertheless, im boasting about it, before the D700 gets out of fashion and they’d invent the latest one.
loving the bags! my favourite shopping bags of late…
tadaaahh!!!D700 body, Nikkor 2.8 (24-70mm) lens, polarizer, SB900 flashgun and
and an 8MB sandisk CF card
and the best of the lot is…the new lens…
its my second dream lens…now, im happy..
* * *
D700 is a fullframe sensor camera thus needing fullframe non-DX lenses (my “ai” lens and the new one will be match made in heaven)…
* * *
note: the above gifts are birthday gifts given on my birthday week, so this is a late post.
thank you to the main sponsor: Mr. S…
after having been on hiatus for some time from wordpress (this has been my “running-away-from-the crowd-place), my online journal (in the truest sense of the word),—i am back and have fully reflected on past events in my slightly-cluttered life.
the past few months i was living in a comfortable cocoon, having had the family around me to give me comfort and love. now, im back in england after a 7 week stint in the philippines for some r&r, i only got myself and hubby for comfort. (i know people say, theyre only a telephone call away, but nothing beats conversation over a cup of cappucino and a big dinefest afterwards with loads of hugs and laughs). so yeah, it is “away from home” sequel to my ongoing drama.
i am digressing, pardon my incoherence, but this time, its a different home coming to england. i am seeing england with new eyes, and all the rest of my senses.
i am appreciating it more, and loving it more, having been away for almost two months, im starting to see the beauty of living here. dont get me wrong, i will never trade the phils. to here, but now, i am accepting the life of a british wife, more openly-not in defeat but with full love and appreciation.
after 5 years!
its him and i, again. and its great. im back on my own two feet…and his’ too!
it does, and it did serve its purpose for me the last few weeks.
an auntie wrote to me via email and asked for the blogs to stop in exchange of her, taking care of my family not being ambushed by unnecessary talks from her evil sisters. she explained to me (and rang my mom and sister) that she was hurt by what her sisters had done and clarified issues with talks about things she said about my dad’s funeral.
she was quite too defensive about her involvement about the whole fracas, and i think its because she doesnt want to be named and included in my blog. this even if my blog was just seen by networks only.
i am NOT proud of what i have done. and id never advocate for people to do the same when in anger. but that was the only way i can hurl pain and insults their way, without being cut-off on the phone(if i rang them on the phone/plus i hate spending phone bills on people i dont care for), and i couldn’t wait to tell them my piece of mind til i get to the phils.
it was even more hurtful for them coz i know they read my blogs (as i am friends with their children/my cousins) and as networks, they can read my blog too. and i could see their ugly faces in my screen every single day.
in the end, my auntie wrote to me and thanked me when i promised to put the blog about her sisters on hold for the moment (until i hear anything new) and promised in return that she will see to it that none of this nonsense will continue. although she also is trying to bridge the gap between my family and her family (aunties and my lola), i conceded to my mom going to my lola’s house as we have nothing against our lola. she was just manipulated by the evil sisters. i told her, i cant promise to build bridges and be friends with the two sisters as i have said things i cannot renege on. there comes a point when turning back is not an option and in my case, i have said things (and they have done and said things) which being friends is quite impossible.
it is sad because i have tried to be a peacemaker in the family but with their attitude and lack of family values, i dont think peacemaking from a mortal being is the answer. divine intervention would be the better option.
so, blogs do work. keep blogging guys=)
today i received words from an auntie of mine who said these (and more) about me:
1)”kahilas niya, murag si kinsa, naminyo lang ug tiguwang nag hinilas hilas na”..
2) “murag si kinsa, unsa ra raba’y trabaho niya didto sa gawas, trabahante ra raba siya, empleyado lang”
(i’ll try my best to translate this in english ,even if in english, it doesnt hold as much weight and insult as it is in visayan)
translation:
1)”who does she think she is, just because she married an old man, she think’s she’s someone!”.
2) “she’s just a lowly employee, a worker, she’s a nobody but whenever she comes home, she acts like she’s not!”.
answers:
- what have i done that you say that i acted like im somebody? just because i have lavish parties and go on trips??? is that license for you to accuse me of acting “being somebody?”. why?? kamo ra ba ang naay katungod mag party ug mag hikay ug mu-travel? just because im a lowly employee of a hospital, i dont have the right to do so? since when was partying exclusive to rich people? did i ask you for a single centavo for the parties at all? nah.
- adrian’s retort about the “old man” comment? he laughed, because he is an old man, (but only in age)! …i was laughing because by what that auntie is doing, it goes to show what desperation can do to you. snarl and growl like a beast!
-when did i ever say i did anything else apart from what i was doing now? kanus-a ko niuli ug cebu na na ingon ko nga artista ko ngari sa UK? everyone knows im a hospital employee, and there is nothing to be ashamed of that. if i was embarrassed by it, i wouldnt be blogging about it eons since. dili ko parehas ninyo na delusional, saying you got businesses, when you dont really have nothing to prove for it. (and dont you dare to ask me to prove this sentence because i will!).
–you see this auntie of mine, used to think/ or still thinks lowly of hospital employees, or any employees for that matter…its so sad, because without hospital employees, there would be no one who’d take care of her with batasan dili makaon ug iro!
* * *
this auntie of mine got so angry about a blog i wrote a few weeks ago…if anyone forgot the disclaimer: i even said, “bato bato sa langit, ang matamaan huwag magalit”,
read the blog here by clicking this link: Can You Sleep At Night?
the weird thing was; she called the blog “greed”. i guess the word stood in front of her like how she would infront of a mirror.
and yes the reason that blog was written was because of the hurt from what they did to us just for a piece of land that my father left for us. but people are intelligent enough to understand that it wasnt as fictional as i wrote it to be.
karma bites in the bum, big time!
* * *
so, you want this war as personal? then i’ll give it my best shot. i’ll make it as beautifully “personal” as i can.
even more better, once i get home, because then YOU CAN SAY IT IN MY FACE.
* * *
and to the other AUNTIE (the younger sis, who pretends to be ”diosnon”/ godlike) who backbites everyone in the family? YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, you frequent my blog anyways.
-auntie dear, does everyone know what you are trying to do? make one person get angry at the other so there’s some sort of war between us relatives? do you want me to prove this? let me know, i have proofs what you told me about the other auntie’s and uncle’s children when you backbited about them to me and to other cousins (lets start from the your best buddy auntie N, what you have said about her children and the wife of her eldest son). you like it when people are angry at one another, it seems like.
why do you sow hate? you are supposed to be the older generation, to teach us cousins to love one another, ikaw na hinuon mag start ug bickerings? i will not forget what you have said about my mama, all those words are embedded in my mind and heart…YOU ARE SUCH A HIPPOCRITE! does your pastor know how you are after you have finished singing your praises to your God?
you are also the one who is starting rift between me and my halfsisters when there is nothing to bicker about…WHY DO YOU LIKE INTRIGUES SO MUCH?? DO YOUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS KNOW THAT YOU BACKBITE THEIR CHILDREN TOO? you make my skin crawl!
YOU are the root of all these bickerings…say these things in my face, and you will know what i really think.
you wanted this fight from the very beginning. i kept my mouth shut, because its between you and my mom, these issues about the “small” land Papa got from your parents, which he wanted to leave to me and my siblings (yes, including my halfsisters!).
but you have become very personal AND WORST OF ALL: you have included “ANA” in your personal vendetta.
auntie, i dont go to church all the time,but i will never do to your children what you have done to us.
the moment, ANYONE who dare insult or touch my sister/my mother, my brothers: DEAL WITH ME.
* * *
i am not apologizing what i write in my blog, IT IS MY BLOG after all.
* * *
this is to show we are not pushovers. just because we allowed you to shout at as, and insult my mother, this does not mean we will allow you to do that forever.
i have been given my first placement (internship) to cap my first year in university. since i work in a physical dysfuntion setting, and my background of expertise is amputation and orthopaedics, and minor background with medicine for the elderly, and physical health, i have been given a task too daunting to imagine, too greater a challenge to refuse.
come june,i will be assigned to a mental health centre, where people who have mental health problems come in for appointments and get their prescriptions and integrate in managed workshops and groupworks with the medical team (psychologists, psychiatrists, mental health nurse,mental health OT’s).
as i was given the brief of the place, the outline of the type of programme was being discussed and the type of work i will be doing, i heaved a sigh of relief. the amazing workshops, the groupwork and the excellent team are such motivators. i already feel at home.
my only concern is: will they ever let me out?
probable answer: no. they probably section me as patient number 27, harhar.
* * *
and because its a mental health centre: people are asked not to wear uniform to avoid insulting and labeling patients.
concern number 2: how would they know which one’s the patient?
probable solutions: wear my badge at all times/and stop talking to myself,haha.
* * *
my classmates are simultaneously doing their own placements at other institutions and at other field of work where some of them are really nervous about.
one, who is being assigned to an amputation rehab setting, is asking me a hundred and one questions what to expect, and what to do, down to the nitty gritty bits of equipment provision and other technical aspects. i refrained on giving her the blow-by-blow account. i will not rob her off the beauty at seeing things from an eye of a first-timer, and experiencing things firsthand, without prior bias nor judgement.
i am going in to this placement myself with the basic knowledge of what to do, what not to do, ethical procedures, manual handling and basic theoretical knowledge, but the gory parts and colourful excerpts, i leave that to the night of presentation itself, when the curtains open and flash the neon sign to say : now showing.
at the end of the day, i hate spoilt endings.
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